Who Hold the Key to Your Happiness?

No one holds the key to your happiness but you.

I know it can seem sometimes that others have the ability to make us  feel  amazing, or dreadful, but even in those instances there are levels of permissions granted beforehand.


The world doesn’t get to determine what makes you smile. If everyone wants to line up for the new iPhone, but you want to run barefoot through the grass with your niece, you can.

We sometimes take the paths that seem to be the right path for us, simply because we see so many others doing the same. When we walk that journey and don’t feel the happiness that was advertised to us, we can find ourselves even faking it, or digging ourselves in even deeper.

The reality is if we’re not happy with what we have, we won’t be happy with what we get. The grass will always seem greener on the other side, because what we really see is a reflection of our envy.

Unhappiness exists when we forget the things we have to appreciate and focus on the things we don’t have, or focus on how our realities  don’t  match  our fantasies. Fantasies don’t end after a certain tax bracket, we’ll always want  more.

It takes effort to be happy, and to keep it up, but once you find that rhythm, you  can share it with others, and spread it like a germ.

UnLearn – 101 Simple Truths for Better Life – Humble Poet


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Keep Records

If your boss asks you to do something and you make a note of  it—in front of him—he will have a very hard job arguing later that you’ve done it wrong or late.

If you have to submit a report, then drop your boss a quick memo or note outlining the salient facts, very briefly, so there will be no confusion later. Keep a copy. Make sure your boss knows you have kept a copy.

This technique isn’t to cover your back because you are up to no good. Instead it clarifies all issues. If it’s in writing, it makes your job so much simpler, so much easier. Who can argue with a written memo? In fact, such things could be forged, written afterwards, changed, amended, and/or rewritten, but we all assume they aren’t, that they are tamper proof.

It is amazing how often the tiniest detail will cause a major upset—unless you got it in writing in the first place. Keeping records isn’t an anal thing to do, but a sensible precaution. None of us has perfect memory. We all forget things—dates, times, details. Once we have made a note of whatever it is, we can refer to it later. And often surprise ourselves with how badly we have remembered  something.


You will often read in management books the advice to throw away all memo or emails or faxes over a certain age—if you haven’t looked at it in six months then you don’t need it. Rubbish. You hang on to everything. Make more filing space rather than throw anything away, unless and until you are 100 percent certain it is not needed.

The Rules of Work – Richard Templar

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There Are No Mistakes, Only Lessons

Have you ever made a mistake? Come on, fess up! We have all made some mistakes in our lives. Some personal, some professional; making mistakes is simply part of life. We don’t let the possibility of making a mistake keep us from making decisions or getting our work done, do we?


So, don’t be afraid of making a mistake when you have to make a decision. If it goes wrong or your solution turns out badly, use it as a learning tool, not only for yourself but for everyone involved. Then fix it and move on.

Mistakes are part of life and can often be repaired, so don’t let that possibility keep you from making decisions.

151 Quick Ideas for Delegating and Decision Making – Robert E. Dittmer
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When the challenges are great

When the challenges are great, so are the rewards. If the journey is long, there is much value to be gained in making it.

When people criticize what you’re doing, it means you’re making a difference. When you keep encountering obstacles, it means you’re moving forward.

Just because you experience life’s difficulties is not a reason to be dismayed. Keep in mind that the more solidly you’re making progress the more resistance you’ll feel.


Feel the resistance, and realize that the very fact you’re feeling it push against you means you’re pushing forward through it. Feel the palpable sense of progress, and keep going.

Just on the other side of challenge is achievement. Just on the other side of the obstacle you’re facing is your next step on the path forward.

Persist through one challenge, and another, and another. You’ll emerge as a much stronger person, having created great new value in your world.

— Ralph Marston
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Enjoy looking forward

Expect a positive outcome, and then go make it happen. Expect a fulfilling experience, and then go get it.

A positive expectation doesn’t guarantee a positive outcome, but it sure does make it more likely. When you expect the best, you give yourself many distinct advantages.


A positive expectation enables you to see more positive, workable possibilities. A positive expectation gives you a solid reason and a powerful motivation to push forward.

When you wish to go in a particular direction, it helps to first turn and face in that direction. By expecting your most highly desired outcome, you can vividly envision and focus on a path that will get you there.

Your efforts impact the quality of your life, and your expectations impact your efforts. It just makes sense to make those influences as positive and affirmative as possible.

Enjoy looking forward to a positive, fulfilling future. Expect the best, and do the work to make it so.

— Ralph Marston
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Procrastination Can Be Your Friend

Success, whether in your personal or your professional life, is  a  result  of  making good decisions. Good decisions are a result of gathering all the pertinent information and using good judgment. Good judgment comes from experience, usually the experience of overcoming a problem  or  a  challenge.  Too  many people rush to a decision or a judgment.

The first thing you need to do when facing any decision is to determine when  is the last minute you can finalize your choice without being penalized. Procrastination is rarely considered to be an admirable trait, but when it comes to decision-making, being the first one in line can often hurt you very badly. How often have you heard people who have been the victim  of  their  own  poor decision say,  “If I had known then what I know now …”? The reality is that  many of these people could have delayed their decision without penalty, and they would have known now that fact or element that they wished they had known earlier.


Once you have determined the last minute you can make your final decision, then you need to start gathering the information you need to know in order to consider all of the alternatives. Let’s say you are trying to decide what to wear to work this morning. Obviously, you might listen to the weather report or look out the window. If it’s particularly hot or cold, you might want to dress accordingly.    If it is raining or snowing, you would want to have an umbrella or boots. This seems elementary, only because you have grown accustomed to having all of the information at your fingertips.

What if I asked you—instead of making a decision today on what you should wear today—to select your wardrobe for a day of work five,  six,  or  seven  months in the future? This would be much harder to do, because the information   is not available yet. There is no reason you should force yourself into a wardrobe decision months in advance.

Too many people are the victim of bad judgment that results in bad decisions simply because they don’t have the information. If they had waited longer to  make the decision, this poor outcome could have been  avoided.

If you are not sure whether to go right or go left, straddle the fence as long as you can. You may find that both roads merge or that there is  a  far  better alternative road that will present itself a little farther on.

Today’s the Day – Jim Stovall
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There Are Times When You Should Move On

Sometimes we have to be patient and sometimes we have to get moving. Wisdom is knowing which time is which and when to do what. I know, easier said than done. But we all know when we’ve exhausted certain possibilities—and quite possibly ourselves—in the course of finding out. Wouldn’t it be great to know everything first?

That could save a lot of time. One way is to train your brain to do some assessing first. Do the “scenario” test: What if I quit this job, what would tomorrow bring? Maybe some adventures, but without a paycheck.What if I stayed in this job? The same old stuff but with a paycheck.What if I thought about a new career? A good plan, because you can stay in your job while you’re working your brain toward something more challenging. Sometimes that will even open up opportunities in your present job. Do the brain work first, asking yourself a lot of questions.


If, at the end of trying to make your current situation better, it is an obvious dead end, then it’s a good time to move on. Maybe it’s just not a good fit. It’s like a relationship—on paper all the important things seem to add up, but the chemistry just isn’t there to make it work in reality. Jobs can be that way, too. Just as I’ve hired people with terrific credentials only to find out it’s simply not a good match, for them or for me. You have to cut your losses quickly.That’s a good thing to learn if you want to be successful.

When we hear of extremely successful people, it’s usually safe to assume they’ve had some obstacles or difficulties along the way. There’s a lot of trial and error before something is effortless or polished. Michelangelo said something worth thinking about: “If people only knew how hard I work to gain my mastery, it wouldn’t seem so wonderful at all.” The problem is, we usually only see the end result and not the process.

It’s not always easy to move on—it’s leaving something behind in a way, but sometimes what’s ahead will be better. We’ve got to do things we’re suited for and hopefully that we enjoy. Success is a great feeling, and success should add to your health, not detract from it.

I sometimes tell people they are not cut out to be entrepreneurs because it’s true. Some people are, and some people aren’t. It will save you a lot of time and hardship if you can figure that out first. As with anything, you have to see how you handle pressure and the risk factor. It’s similar to going through the set of questions we had at the beginning of this essay. Learn to scrutinize yourself and your capabilities, and find the time for some thought- provoking thinking. As Confucius said,“Learning without thought is labor lost.” Don’t let that apply to you. Learn, work, and think in equal proportions, and you’ll be going in the right direction.



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